Q: I have an awesome relationship with a great woman. We are best friends. I have herpes she does not. Both of us have not done that much research.
I’ve talked with her if we can sit down and figure out how we can be with each other. She knows I have Herpes. How do I go about this? What information can I give her? What steps do we take for her not to be exposed? What questions does she need to ask? I know she will always be a risk but how do we minimize that risk? Obviously I know protection, but my outbreaks do generate from the groin area (haven’t had a outbreak in 4 years but I have the tingling and itching often). And I’m also worried about the pre symptoms, shedding I believe it is a called. Any help or advise will help.
A: If you experience a burning, itching or tingling feeling that could be a result of herpes surfacing the skin. When herpes surfaces the skin that’s referred to as shedding. When shedding occurs herpes is more likely to spread. If you experience burning, itching or tingling sensation its best to avoid sex. If you experience those symptoms frequently you may want to ask your doctor if you could take Valtrex or Acyclovir while these symptoms are active. Taken medication if needed reduces the chance of passing genital herpes to a partner.
It’s best to use a latex lubricated condom. Lubricated condoms are less likely to break. I suggest inspecting a condom before use. In rare cases condoms could be defective. Dental dam could be used for oral sex. It’s important to do research and to be fully educated about how herpes is spread. If safe sex happens the chance of passing herpes to a partner could be low. I always suggest a couple gets tested for STDs before starting a new relationship.
A person should be certain they don’t have a different STD. Many people have STDs and don’t show symptoms. It’s important to be aware intense sex could contribute to genital herpes outbreaks. Some research states that friction could irritate the skin. That’s another reason why people with herpes should avoid sex during outbreaks. Keep in mind a condom doesn’t always cover 100% of the genital region. Condom do help a lot.
Forming a relationship with a partner could be very rewarding. A person with herpes could have a successful relationship with someone who doesn’t have the virus.